Take from me — see your heroes before it's too late
When Frank Sinatra came to Washington in 1992, I almost went to see him. But then I thought: Tickets are expensive, and his voice isn't what it once was. I skipped the show — and immediately regretted it. Next time, I told myself. But there was no next time. A few years later, he was gone. I had passed up the chance to see one of the greatest voices of the 20th century.
So, I made a decision: Every chance I had, I would see a performer whose music I love — regardless of age, infirmity or musical style. My mantra became: See them before they die. Over the past three decades, that quest has taken me to venues across the country to see every imaginable genre of live music.
That vow took me, in the years that followed, to RFK Stadium, where I saw Pink Floyd and the Grateful Dead. In November, it brought me to Huntington Beach for the Darker Waves Festival, where I spent 12 hours in an '80s music nirvana: the English Beat, Orchestral Maneuvers in the Dark, Violent Femmes, Devo, Soft Cell, the Psychedelic Furs, the Human League, the B-52s, New Order and Tears for Fears.
It was not until the '90s that I began concert-going in earnest. In 1996, I met my nowwife, Pam. I knew she was The One when she accepted my invitation to go on a first date to see … KISS. How could I not fall in love? She got me back years later when, for my 40th birthday, she took me to Las Vegas to see … Barry Manilow. (What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas!)
I have made it my mission to make sure they see music history live while they can. We've taken the kids to see many legendary acts: Diana Ross (age 79), the Rolling Stones (Mick Jagger and Keith Richards both 80), Paul McCartney (81), as well as U2.
“Live music allows us a real, incarnational connection to the music we love,” Mark, my original partner in concert-going, told me. “Like time spent `in person' with a friend versus a phone call. It's spontaneous and a little unpredictable; something we all crave in our overscheduled, often virtual lives.”
I also hate it when politics gets in the way of music. Pat Benatar won't play “Hit Me With Your Best Shot” live anymore to protest gun violence. (I'm pretty sure the song refers to sex, not firearms.) But I'm happy to see artists whose politics I disagree with — if I weren't, I'd have a very narrow list to choose from. Last year, I saw John Mellencamp, an outspoken man of the left, for the first time. Hearing “Pink Houses” and “Small Town” live was well worth the political commentary. The only artist whose music I love but won't see is Roger Waters. Antisemitism is a bridge too far for me.
Even if I do see them all, eventually all my favorite artists will, like Sinatra, leave us. What then? I'm seeing many of the musicians I love performing well into their 70s and beyond. But who will I see in when I'm in my 70s? So, I'm on the lookout for younger acts. I've become a big fan of Mayer Hawthorne, Twin Tribes, Young Gun Silver Fox, Blossoms, Lovelytheband, Izo FitzRoy and Smoove & Turrell, among others. Even in late middle age, I still find immeasurable joy in discovering a new song and playing it until I know the words by heart — just like I did as a kid on my record player.
But as great as records are, nothing compares to seeing the songs you love performed live. So, I plan to keep going to see my favorites until they die — or I do.