Finally free but afraid she’ll go off rails
DEAR ABBY >> I grew up with very strict parents. They used money to control me, even after I graduated from college and grad school. I’m happy to report that I recently landed my dream job. I have achieved financial freedom and, at last, I’m independent.
My question is, how do I avoid going wild? I’m suddenly free to do whatever I want, and I’m tempted to go out and party like I never could before. I worry, though, that I don’t know how to indulge without going over the top.
I’ve been enjoying concerts, staying up too late and eating a ton of junk food. All of that seems fine within reason, but I already feel like I’ve been drinking too much, and I would hate for my freedom to negatively impact my job performance or have any lasting negative consequences.
I know I’m dealing with something most people process in college, when there is a roommate to help you look out for yourself, a class schedule to maintain and limited funds to spend. Instead, I’m on my own, working a job I love with a flexible schedule and I earn enough to go out as often as I please. I know I should be saving and budgeting, but I haven’t gotten there yet.
Basically, I’m asking for advice on how to enjoy my new freedom in a responsible, healthy way — without going wild. — Unleashed in Illinois
DEAR UNLEASHED >> A way to avoid overspending and prepare for your future would be to start saving a predetermined amount from your paycheck on a regular basis. Find out whether your employer has a program in place in which a certain amount of money can be automatically withheld from employees’ salaries and placed in a savings or retirement account.
As to your newfound freedom: Although you are a bright young woman and academically accomplished, you may need some guidance now. Talk about this with a licensed psychotherapist until you are less tempted to compensate by “running wild.”