Put it in a spreadsheet? I would if I could, but they make me cry
Iwas having a drink with a mate of mine who’ s a plasterer. Among the complex chitchat was the subject of pensions. He was expressing a grave concern that he didn’t really have one.
We’re both punching the early 50s mark. This was a discussion point that kept rolling far beyond the time that was spent on other subjects.
A few days later he told me he had booked an appointment with an independent financial advisor. The conversation must have instilled a sense of terror among everyone present as it rumbled through the Whatsapp group for many days after.
The overriding theory was that most people will have to work until they’re 136 years old.
I booked up a consultation myself as I could feel the panic rising in my own chest.
I was asked to complete a financial state questionnaire. This is a form with the sole purpose of showing you how many holes you have in your bucket. It’s the equivalent of saying: ‘Here’s what you could have won.’
For those people like me who chose the ‘head in the sand’ approach to finances, it’s quite a challenging form.
Add to that the changes in mortgages (have you had the chat about why we all didn’t fix for 20 years when it was so low?), everything looks expensive.
Then the worst part of the form. If you’ve had lots of different jobs, you may have lots of different pensions.
The only person who could understand multiple small pensions would be Indiana Jones, as he can decipher and understand hieroglyphics. For everyone else it’s a mystery.
While going through these questions, the financial advisor mentioned: ‘If it’s easier, you can put it all on a spreadsheet.’
This comment makes me want to burst into tears. However, there are those out there to whom the phrase: ‘How about a spreadsheet?’ is almost erotic. My wife is one of them.
There are few things in the world of admin that send her into a flurry of excitement like a spreadsheet. She’s not alone.
I don’t get them. Can’t build them. Find them frustrating. I may be in the minority. Perhaps with financial planning chaos, pension confusion and being baffled by spreadsheets, I’m starting to see a pattern. Maybe I’m a bit thick?
For those like me who chose the ‘head in the sand’ approach, it’s quite a challenging form