That moment when you realise kids can beat you at most things
It comes to something when you realise your children are better than you and most things, even thought they are just eight and 10. Take Freddie for example. He swims each Monday evening. Even though he’s a good swimmer, he’s stayed on to top squad at the swimming school.
I watched him on Monday. His technique was really good, his front crawl strong and fast and his breast stroke was superb.
I realised he can probably swim further than I ever could and he would thrash me at breast stroke as I never dip my head underwater, unlike him.
Then there is French. It has always been my dream to be able to get by when in the country, but alas, there has been no improvement.
I know how to mention to a hotel receptionist what we have a reservation for two people or "deux bières s'il vous plaît,” but I know damn well if I’m asked anything back it will be: “parlez Anglais”?
Fredster on the other hand, has been doing French after school for a couple of years and is constantly putting me right. I know it will be him getting me out of trouble on our next visit to the boulangerie!
My final humiliation and why I’m feeling very down about myself came at the weekend when I taught both my children how to play chess.
I downloaded a version on the ipad which meant a move that wasn’t legal couldn’t be made. Great for them and for me as I forgot most of the
Sir Lindsay Hoyle (right, House of Commons), who has been reelected as Commons Speaker. rules!
I dispatched Freddie quite quickly but it took 50 minutes to beat my daughter who took my queen after just 10 minutes!
I got to the stage where I decided I wasn’t going to help her anymore. It felt like I was treating her like a Grand Master.
Even when she only had her king left and I still had my queen (which I’d won back after one of my pawns made it to her side) and my bishop, it still took over 10 minutes to finish her off.
Surely there is something I can
I downloaded a version on the ipad which meant a move that wasn’t legal couldn’t be made
“I think it’s more nerveracking to receive the award from him than to sing in front of him.”
Dame Shirley Bassey has received her Companion of Honour award from the King. do better than my kids. DIY? No. Cooking? Probably not. Surely mathematics? No, Freddie is a maths genius!
It was then I figured out something I could beat them at. As I found the ‘yard of ale’ glass, Sarah pointed out they were indeed just eight and 10. Damn!
“They [the ‘mystic meerkats’] do seem sure England will make it to the final.”
Head keeper Gemma Romanis at Drusillas Park in East Sussex.